Qualities Needs to Succeed

Desire -

       

       Can small fire give much heat ? No. Likewise a weak desire cannot produce great results. Successful people have big desire, burning desire. A desire that they can't stop themselves from fulfilling their dream.

Commitment and determination -

        

        When we play to win, we play with enthusiasm and commitment and chances are that you win whereas when we play not to lose, we are playing to avoid failure. Successful people are committed and determined to win. They are determined such a way that no one can stop them.

Don't make excuse -

          Majority of people blame others for their mistakes, failures. The problem is that it doesn't allow you to grow. Happy people take responsibility of their mistakes. Use that failure as a chance to change their lives for better.

Spend money on experiences than material things -

            In the book 'The Myths of Happiness'  Sonja Lyubomirsky explained that materialism deplets happiness, threatens satisfaction with our relationships, makes us less likey to help others, makes unhealthy environment. 

Taking risk -

   

             They take risks. These people don't afraid to fail. They know if they fail they learn something and if they succeed someone learn from them.

Responsibility -

         Most people stay in comfort zone and live passive lives without accepting responsibilities. They are looser. They don't take any responsibility while successful people are opposite. They are always eager to take responsibility.

 Handle criticism positively -

          It's important to be able to distinguish honest criticism from jealousy- inspired criticism, this is the skill that successful people have. The more you move towards success, the risk of criticism increased.

Hardwork -

         Nature gives birds their food but never put it in their nests. Birds have to do it by themselves. When we are born we all are empty but afterthat what we do decides our future.

Give more than you get -

  

          Successful people get their work done in time for what they get paid and inspite of that they do more.

Treat everyone with respect and kindness -

          They know in order to gain respect, first you have to give it to others. They are kind to others. They never forget their roots.

Persistence -

           Most of the people when tired after 1-2 attempts, stop working on that problem. But successful people are persistent. They only stop when they find solutions for their problems that is when they reach their goals. 

Optimistic -

          Bad things happen to all of us even happy people also but they don't complain. They think of alternative ways to problems and fix it. They remain optimistic in every situation.

Dream big -

           If you fail to think big, you limit your opportunities. Successful people not only big dream but also work hard to achieve it.

           

Discipline -

            These are disciplined people, they trained themselves to work in strictly controlled manner. They know that being disciplined gives them strength to withstand at difficult times.

Spend time alone

           This give chance to deal with your worries, to take care of health and relaxing the mind.

Celebrate other people's success -

          They never feel jealous of other people. When others win they gives constructive response. Thus they nurture relations. They have 'let's grow together' kind of attitude. They discuss ideas not people.

Growth mindset -

    They know making mistakes is natural part of learning success, they learn and grow from their mistakes. They refuse to quit. They know that only way to better is practice, practice and practice.

Inner peace : 20 ways to master your emotions

         Inner peace is what even when things are going badly, someone treats you badly, criticized you, you can still be happy and peaceful person. Is It look like impossible ? Yes you are right as it's human nature when someone hit you will definitely hit them and disturb your peace of mind and think on it for hours and hours. But today I will give you some interesting ways for mastering your emotions, for achieving inner peace. 

1) Past is totally gone, forget it so it doesn't spoil your present. Live in now. Anyone don't know what tomorrow will bring, what happens in next minute.

2) Anything that costs your peace of mind that may be a friend or someone or something else, learn to let it go.

3) Remember your thoughts make your life. If you think negative thoughts, you stuck in negativity all over the life. But if you create positive thinking, your life is fill up with much more positiveness.

4) Your emotions and mood are byproducts of how you think and feel. Stop overthinking.

5) Don't compare. Comparison is a thief of joy. You are beautiful and unique. If you are fat, people judge you, if you are slim they judge you. People judge you know matter what. So try to be yourself.

6)  Enjoy your own company. If you can't find peace within yourself, you will never find it anywhere else. Do things which you like.

7) Meditation is best, it invoke the sense of peace and calm. Everyday meditate for atleast 15 min.

8) Open yourself to new experiences, open yourself to change. 

9) Focus on the things that are within your control. Those are energy and efforts. 

10) Express gratitude. I wake up, I have clothes to wear, food to eat, running water to drink. Yes, life is good. I am thankful. Thankfulness generates contentment and satisfaction which in turn leads to inner peace.

11) Don't listen to others. Listen your inner voice. Do the things in which you find satisfaction, comfort, happiness.

12) Healthy body leads to healthy mind. If you lost your health in the name of career, money...then you have to pay money of hospitals. Take care of your health. Mental and physical health both are equally important to live a happy life.

13) Give up the need to react to everything that happens to you, give up blaming yourself for everything, you will achieve inner peace.

14) Don't get too attached to anyone in this world. People forget their promises. Some use you for their benefit. Love yourself.

15) Don't complain. People complain about various things. Like If I have money, I will buy everything. If I would be tall, I look good and have perfect personality.. Such attitude leads to aggressive, desperate state of mind. Avoid this. Be thankful in whatever you have.

16)  Change the environment. Sometimes living in one place for long time feels depressive. Spend time in nature. Take a trip, long drive or a simple walk.

17) Plan everything. Make a timetable. There is time for everything. Time to play, time to eat, time to sleep.

18) Self talk is important. 

19) Inhale good things and exhale bad things. Stop the thoughts which controls you.

            

20)  Learn to be silent. A pot was once asked, how do you remain cool in every situation ?  Pot said, ' by reminding myself. By reminding I am made up of mud and will return back to mud. Then why have pride and anger ?'

Whatever has happened, has happened for good

Whatever is happening is also for good

Whatever will happen, shall also be good

What have you lost that you cry for ?

What did you bring, that you have lost ?

What did you create that was destroyed ?

What you have taken, has been from here

What you gave has been given here

What belongs to you today,

Belonged to someone yesterday 

and will be someone else's tomorrow.

Change is the law of  The Universe.

                       

 

                          - The Bhagavad-Gita

 Related: Healthy habits

How to Cope with Stress and Depression during Corona Virus Outbreak

       

         We all are staying at home from March 2020 due to the global Covid 19 situation. We can't go outside. We are all stay- at home restrictions. Our job changes to work from home. some lost jobs,  some are grieving due to loss of loved ones. Children are on holidays. Online education system has arrived. Maids are on leaves. Mostly women are suffering from depression all the time. Some are being forced to spend months and months in unhappy, abusive relationships. Due to social distance we are becoming more alone, negative, hopeless, frustrated and cut off.

         How to stay fresh and how to cope with these depression and fear of virus? 

         If you constantly think about virus, virus and virus then surely it will affect your mental health then the fear of virus may become more infectious than the virus itself. So stop thinking about it. 

         Once there was a man, someone asked him If you are at your last stage how would you like to die ? He replied I would like to die instant rather than suffering from pain. Then the man brought a snake in front of him and close his eyes and stuck a needle on his leg. Can you guess what happened next ? He died instantly not because of the snake but because of fear of snake bite. In the postmortem, it is found that the poison produced is none other than by his body itself due to fear. 

 Also read : Anxiety                

         Take all the things positively. know that you are not alone facing this pandemic situations. Our life has become so fast that we never get time to think what you are doing, are you happy with that? This a pause to your running life. Isn't it ? In this time you can take care of yourself, you can give time to you, you can focus on your personal growth, meditate. 

           In this pandemic, your schedule has disturbed, sleeping too much, skipping meal or watching TV all day. Mostly teenager turns to unhealthy ways drinking too much, smoking, taking drugs, eating junk foods which lead to more worst your depression and affects your health. Break this cycle and maintain your routine. Exercise, learn new language, instrument.

          Limit your access to social media. Don't check news often, don't read news about corona. Social media will fuel negativity and fear. Take precautions. Focus on what you can control ( good hygiene ).

            You can make your connections strong with your family members, your long distance relatives, friends. You can schedule online get-togethers with group of people and can enjoy. You can play with kids, give time for your children. Gardening is also a best, you can do it at home itself.

              If you have a terrace then go and spend time there. Take photographs of nature, dance, read lots of books, learn new skills. Play indoor games, draw and paint. Listen music. Watch funny video clips. Spend time with pets. You know what hobbies are best to relieve your stress and feel energized. 

             Here I will tell you, why you feel grateful ? Yesterday I asked a food delivery boy, Why isn't he is staying at home ? He said, " we don't have any food to eat, If I stop doing this who can survive my family ? Who give money to pay for our expense ? In my family only I am who earns money. After listening to his answer shiver comes on my body. Then I realized though we all are suffering from this situation but still have food to eat and facilities at home. I am grateful. You don't know how some people are suffering  from this pandemic situations ? Be thankful.

              Lastly I want to tell you all don't feel depressed, you are not alone. Mental health is important. Take proper caution, use common sense. Stay home, stay safe.

Related : Depression

Personality development by improving yourself

       

       When we are doing something for long time, we start going into comfort zones that restrict our progress. Hence there should me someone, something that continuously inspires you. when we are down in life you need personal development the most. Our looks, skin colour, height are our identity, it's unique. Create such a personality which makes people appreciate you beyond your looks. So start finding and growing self.

         Development of pleasing personality based on three factors -

1. Physical and psychological development -

 

          Knowing yourself is self awareness but today we are becoming so busy that we don't get time to take care of ourselves. Set aside your 1 hour out of 24 hrs for self improvement. You must give that time for yourself.  Do something everyday that improves your overall state of mind. Vizualize your day, read motivational posts, self help books, spend time in nature, meditate, exercise. Small amount of physical activity can make a big difference but if you suddenly push yourself into strenuous activity you will just end up frustrated. So avoid doing that. Make a balance. 

        Take good amount of sleep, 7 hours sleep is enough. Eat healthy, take care of your health.

        Control your emotions. Think before you speak. Anger destroys everything and leads to regret. Relax. Be calm. Learn to manage anger. Don't argue for unnecessary things. Learn to be silent. Don't speak too much. 

        Delete unnecessary and addict apps. Ask yourself do I need it ? Does that waste my time ? am I addicted to the app ? Can I do something productive in that time ? 

2. Elimination of negative energy and attitude -

        Stay away from negative people, negative situations. Build a  positive attitude to every situation. Think of alternative way for your problems. Problem solving is a skill, learn it. You are smart enough to figure it out. Give yourself enough time. Believe in your inner resources.

       Don't lie to yourself. Accept your flaws. People who does not value themselves, cannot value anyone. Be independent. How you choose to think yourself comes from the feeling of independence. Don't expect anything from anyone.

3. Relationship with other humans -

        Treat other humans with respect. Transformation happens when you are healed and started healing others (helping others).

        Communication skills are important part of personality development. Be humorous. Stand without bend. Make an eye contact with the other person. Have a smile on your face. Work with best people and learn from them.

        Don't chase people. Instead work hard on yourself and your work. People will attract towards you. People who belong to you, find you. Just do your thing. Be practical.

        

         Teachers won't make you intelligent,
         Trainers won't make you fit,
         Nutritionalist won't make you healthy,
         No one is going to feed you.
         No one make you rich,
         You have to get up,

         You have to take responsibility of yourself.

10 Things to Improve Your Life

If you can do little changes in your life that will really make a  huge difference.

1) Get up early -

       Get up early in the morning and go to sleep early this will transform your life. If it has been difficult for you to get up at a particular time then set alarm one hour before the time you have to wake up. This makes easy to wake up at that particular time. Do try. It really works.

2) Social media-

        Don't open Facebook, WhatsApp unless necessary. Instead read newspaper, books, talk to people. Spend time with your loved ones, family, kids. Those are the memories you want to hold on to forever.

3)wake up like a crazy person-

       If you wake up with your troubles then you are going to have bad day instead you should say "Hey baby..! I'm ready to rock and roll..wohoo..!

4)Exercise-

        Exercise will help you to reduce stress. As during exercise body secrets hormones that helps body toe relax. No matter how busy you are at least go for 15min. Walk daily.

5)Motivational poster-

          Having motivational poster in room improves success rate. It helps to get rid of procastination.

6)Reading-

         Read every single day to increase your vocabulary and knowledge.

7) Identify your goal-

          The bigger your goal, the bigger is your perspective would be and it helps you to move towards positive things. Set daily tasks that move you closer to ultimate goal.

8) Eat healthy-

          Control your junk food intake. Stop drinking caffeine.

9)Be flexible-

          Do not program your mind to stick to one schedule. Be little flexible. If you are keep doing same thing everyday, you are going to take out excitement out of life. So try something new.

10)Learn to let go-

          Everything happens for the best, because it teaches you a lesson for improvement.

Listen to music - 

       Music affects the brain in a very interesting way. As you are listening, keep your focus on the sensation of music. Try not to think about the meaning of the lyrics or past memories of listening to a particular song. Instead try to enjoy the music. Listen to the music without thinking about it.

Everything You Need to Know About Depression

         

 

           Depression is a feeling of sadness and loss of interest. It is a kind of illness. It comes from the death of loved ones, family members, it might come from work stress, worry about finances, breakup or from the feeling that no one is for you, no one loves you, students not getting results from their efforts,  postnatal depression, troubled relationships, divorce.

          How do we come to know that we are in depression or not ? There are some symptoms which are present in these kind of people those signs are :

• Overthinking, 
• Trouble in concentrating, 
• Memory issues, 
• Constant worrying, 
• Headache,
•  Insomnia, 
• Frustration,
•  Lack of interest, 
• Anxiety ( panic attacks), 
• Isolation.

           WHO estimates that at around 450 million people currently suffer from this condition. At it worst, depression can lead to suicide. Over 800000 people die due to suicide every year. From 10 year boys to 50 year old adults suffer from this mental health problem. 

           If you could see the problem is lying in you, you only have to find it and fix. Our daily life is too fast that we merely get time to eat, to sleep. We are running behind money, we forget if we loose our mental health, what's the use of the money we earn. Friends I want you to know depression, mental health are becoming serious health issues in these days and if you couldn't realize it in initial stages, it may lead life threatening over the period of time in future.

            What can you do ? Here are some techniques to manage your thoughts, emotions, discomforts, behaviour.

•   First in order to solve  problem, you have to understand the root cause, what is the problem actually.
•   If you tell yourself you don't want to think a certain thought, you know what, that is the first think comes in your mind. This is the nature of human mind.
•     Overthinking is dangerous. It affects your health, you may sometimes lose your weight. There are millions of people on this planet and they all have different views, opinions. You can't control other people way of thinking. Practice mindfulness. Pay attention to present moment. Don't overthink about other's negative comments,  negative criticism. Stop judging yourself negatively for feeling anxious. Don't add more complexity to the situation.
•    Best effective remedy is keep yourself busy. Try tiring your mind that mean give no time to your brain to think anything negative. Exercise and medication relieves your stress level.
•    Music is the best therapy to treat your depression. Listen classical, calm music. Happy music lifts your mood as when you are happy endomorphins secreted and this keep you blood pressure under control.
•    Smell the soil, get your hands dirty in soil. In soil, a bacterium namely Mycobacterium vaccae found, which makes you feel happy as it produces serotonin which is an antidepressant drug.
•   Avoid your smartphone as much as you can. Have face to face conversation than on social media. Have some true friends who knows you, supports you rather than many fake friends. Do you know if you can cut your screen time by 25%, you will really see huge difference in your sleep. It's not done instantly but if you could do regularly, you will gradually get better results.
•   Keeping a journal helps you on which things you waste your time, what do I have to be grateful for ? How many hours of sleep you gets each night ? Write down this in that journal, you will get an idea about how you are doing.
•    Go to bed early and wake up early and at the same time. Before going to bed, reserve some time to read books, to do something which makes you feel calm and relax. Adequate sleep is important to proper functioning of our brain. Sleeping or depression pills works by balancing chemicals in the brain that affect mood and emotion. This pills help you sleep better, improve your mood. But don't take without doctor's recommendations.
•   Communication is the best way to reduce some levels of stress. Talk to your close friend or relatives that supports you. 
•   There is an old saying, Birds of feather flock together. In schools, colleges you can see that similar kind of people, similar nature or similar thinking people find eachother or people in group become a same over time. So surround yourself with positive people that always talk about good ideas, good habits good health. If you live in the negative environment, chance is higher that you may feel negative all the time.
•   Participate in cultural activities, join clubs, play a lot. It is seen that people that participated in these kinds of activities have lower level of depression.
•   Laugh loudly, there is no need of money. Laughing reduce chances of heart attack.
•   Learn emotional intelligence. Learn how to interact effectively at work, discriminate between different emotions.
•  It is seen that teenager as well as adults turns to unhealthy ways of eating, drinking, taking drugs, smoking. This only lead your depression to worst. Eat only healthy and fresh foods such as Calcium rich foods, omega-3- fatty acid, fibre rich food, vitamins and proteins, whole grains, fresh fruits and green vegetables.
• Many people harm themselves, think about suicide. No, this is not a solution. Don't do that. Look at your mom, she kept you in her womb for 9 months, she gave you birth by tolerating unbearable pain. Your parents raised you, they work to fulfill your desire, your education. Inspite of all these if you get such a kind of thoughts please seek a medical help. Ask to a mental health expert.                      

                 There are four ways to cope with depression. This will help you to understand what is happening to you and expand healthy options to cope up with depression.           

      1) Medication, Relaxation, Stress and anger management
       2) Talk therapy
       3) Cognitive behavioural therapy
       4) Antidepressants, Anxiolytic, nerve pain medication.               

       

Thank you for reading this. If this note touched you, write down in comment sections. Share with all, you don't know maybe someone around you suffering from depression.

How to live happy life, claim your happiness

               If you stress over little things, your chances of reducing life span is high. Before regret live the life happily. 

1) Look at ones below you and feel grateful, look at ones above you and feel inspired.

2) One thing to forget is forget who behaves wrong with you and one thing to remember is death.

3) Don't dependent on anyone in this world. You are the architecture of your life.

4) Happiness not depend on external factors but on the choice you make every moment.

5) You are loved when you are born, you will be loved when you die. Only thing you have to do is in between birth and death you have to manage.

6) Do not bound to same routine. Be flexible. Spend time with family, friends that makes you happy.

7) Happiness and attitude are the choices. 

8) Happiness is like a butterfly, the more you chase,more it will go away. But if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit gently on your shoulder.

9) Break the habit of replaying negative experiences.

10) Happiness is contagious. When you surround yourself with happy, positive, supportive people, you will be become same.

 

11) Love what you have before life teaches you to love what you have lost. Enjoy where you are no matter what.

12)  Thankfullness generates contentment and satisfaction. Be thankful.

13) What others think is none of your business. Do your own work, stay focused.

14) Beauty is linked to our inner happiness.

15) Avoid why, don't, can't.

16) There are billions of people in the world. Everyone has different opinions, everyone has some strength, weaknesss. Perfectionism leads to high levels of stress. Accept the fact that no one is perfect.

17) No one cares about yoy, people care about themselves.

18) Happiness is a state of mind. It is constantly being love with yourself.

19)

20) Life is a sandwich. Birth is one slice and death is another slice. What you put in between is up to you. Is your sandwich is tasty or sour ?

LOW SELF ESTEEM : No Problem Work on It from Today

       Self esteem means how you feel about yourself, your opinion about yourself. 

       There are two types of self esteem one is high self esteem and other is low self esteem. Do you have high or low self esteem ? Your glass is half fill or half empty.

1) High self esteem -

        In this category people know that they have weaknesses but they are enough strong to overcome it. There glass is half full.

2) Low self esteem-

        In this category people compare themselves to others, they don't believe in themselves, they focus on their weaknesses. There glass is always half empty.

      If you feel low self esteem then you are at right place. First understand that You are great at so many things, someone somewhere needs you. World is too big. You can start working towards getting high self esteem today. Read below point :

        Tell yourself you are valuable. From prime minister to actresses we all feel hesitant, afraid, inferior sometimes, somehow, somewhere. We all have insecurities, confusion, problems. We all are human beings. We all made mistakes. We all have a dark side. So accept it. Accept yourself as you are. Healthy self esteem means you feel good about yourself as deserving the respect from others. When you have low self esteem you put little values on your thoughts and ideas. Don't do that. Believe in your inner resources no matter what. There is only one ' You' . Find out this you. Be somebody that others never ever think.

       Your value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth. Believing in yourself requires constantly engaging in positive self talk. Ask yourself why I feel inferior?  No one has born with low self esteem. It generally builds as we grow up due to needs not being met, negative feedback from others and by knowing the source of lower self esteem, you can overcome it.

        Stay in hostel that forces you to socialize with people.Travel by yourself. Have a friend that will help you to laugh at yourself. Nothing provides social skills like play does. Go to play ground, there are people like you, interact them, play with them.

       Do things you have never done before. Try Waking up at 5 am which is difficult. Do it.  Growth is a process, you can't get instant results. When you plant a seed in the ground, after 3-4 days there is no any growth then do you remove it ? No you don't. You would continue to water until it blooms. Keep going until you reach your target.

        Try new things. Atleast you did something that so many more just could never. Develop good communication skill, take part in activities, make good decisions that improves who you are.  How you choose to think about yourself. It comes from strong feeling of independence.Think that you are awesome. The man who does not value himself cannot value anything or anyone.

           Avoid focusing on what you cannot do. Focus on what you can do without expecting approval from others. Why should we worry about what others think ? Do their opinion have more value than your own.

           Comparison is the root cause of low confidence. There is no word like comparison in your life.when comparison is dead in your life you feel good not to others but for yourself. Listen to your inner voice is more powerful than you never ever think.

           It feels good about ourselves when we are fit and healthy. Small amount of physical activity, exercise make a difference. What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are not as important as what lives within us.Once you start taking care of yourself on the outside and inside , your self confidence will improve.when you look best, you feel your best.Beauty begins at the moment you decided to be yourself. 

         Confident or high esteem people are more sure about a positive result. I don't know if that girl is going to accept my proposal but I will survive, if she doesn't. I don't know how to fish but I will figure it out. Self confidence with humanity is important but self confidence with ego leads to arrogance. When you say I know everything, you prevent yourself from improvement.

          Consider the pressure you are putting on yourself in all areas whether it be career, or managing household chores, your relationships. In this kind of area people make unobtainable goal and it lead to low self esteem. It will take time, practice and efforts to fulfill your goals. Your looks, skin colour, height, weight are your identity. Don't overthink on it. Accept and respect them as it is. They make you unique and beautiful. 

           We only have one life..love, laugh, one chance to be young. Don't miss it in thinking on small small things. You have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn't worked. Now try approving of yourself and see what happens. Thanks for reading.

Read more : Love Yourself

POSITIVE ATTITUDE

 

"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude towards it, for that determines our success or failure"

                               - Norman Vincent Peale

        Everyone has some strenghts and weaknesses. Some of them focus on only negative, weaknesses and start feeling disappointed. Some focuses more on strength and these are positive people. Positive attitude means practicing to become positive in every situation. There are lots of benefit of positive attitude:

• It Increases productivity, 
• Solves problems,
•  brain sharpens,
• Boosts creativity,
• Makes a pleasing personality,
• Better relation with your partner, friend, co-workers,
• Create healthy work environment,
• Reduces stress, anger,
• Benefit for society,
• Maintain loyality,
• Increases life span

         One should practice following steps to build and maintain positive attitude :

        Start looking for what is right in a person or situation instead of looking for what is wrong. There is something positive in every situation and in every person. Only thing is that you have to search for the positive. Always talk about happiness, health, good qualities, prosperity, strengths to every person you meet. Give everyone a smile. Your problem is not your problem it's your  attitude towards it. Say like even at the moment it seems difficult but with consistent efforts, I will definitely do it.   

Do remember one word " PAINS " -

 P - Positive 

A - Attitude

I - In 

N - Negative 

S - Situation 

         Many of our blessings are hidden treasure. Count that blessings, not trouble. There is a lot to be thankful for. Everyday is not good but there is something good in everyday, agree or not ?

          Negative people will always look for negative. They spread negative messages. Don't let negative people drag you down. Remember that a person's character is not only judged by the company they keeps but also by the company he avoids. If you always take negative doses, it will only secrets negative harmones. But if you take positive, motivational doses you will notice that positive harmones lifts your mood.

            Never make excuses. Never live tomorrow which you can do today. Break the habit of delaying. Enjoy unexpected things, even though you don't want that originally. If boss gives you new task then instead of saying I have never done it before, how could I do that..inspite of that if you say, oh..I get an opportunity to learn something new. That is a positive approach. Fix yourself, modify yourself in such a way that whatever happens you will be ok. Sometimes our fear don't let us think positively. Wait. Don't take action when you are fearful.

          Your mind is a powerful thing fill it with positiveness then your life will start to change. Do remember life is 1% what happens to you but its the 99% how you react to it and how you handle the situation. Remember, S + R = O. Here S is situation, R is response and O is outcome. So your response is responsible for your outcome. If something seems difficult, complicated..tackle it from different angle, change your way of thinking towards the difficulty.

           A baby mosquito come back after his first flying..his mom asked him, how did you feel ? He replies, it was awesome mom, all humans clapped hands for me. What a positive way of thinking..! Don't waste your time on what others think.

           There are two kinds of people - givers and takers. Takers eat good, givers sleep good. Givers have a positive attitude. Be a giver. Be a positive magnet. Then what happens next..? Positive will inturn attracts towards you. 

        

How to Cope with Anxiety

        

          Anxiety is the intense worrying that you can't control. You are creating an imaginary future which makes you afraid. This is a kind of mental illness.  

         Anxiety develops from the fear of being alone, from failing, from being rejected, due to some events in past, fear of things that you don't know, thinking of future. A person which experiences panic attacks or anxiety attacks suffers continuous anxiety, constant worrying, avoids several places and situatios. Due to which life becomes unbearable, difficult, hopeless for that person.

         How to know that someone is suffering from anxiety? Lack of patience, trouble in concentration, panic attacks, rapid heart beats,  constant worrying, insomnia, procastination these symptoms are found in anxious person.

         So first find the root cause of your anxiety. Why you feel anxious ? Getting worried is not the solution it might become one more problem in future. If you want to kill mosquitoes, cover the drainage first rather than applying mosquito repellent. Understand your fear. If you put your hours in thinking what happens next, or any event in past then you only re-remembering all the incidence again and again. So at the end what happens ? You are trapped. You will never enjoy your present. So instead of living life in worry you have option you can neutralise your fear with joy, happiness, love. So how can you do that ? 

           Accept the situation. Say like this is a panic attack. I have had before and it does nothing to me, it don't kill me, they come and pass. Whatever going in life just accept it and try to adjust with it instead of complaining. Past cannot be changed and we never know what brings our future, what happens in next minute we don't know then why are you worrying so much ? Live in the present. Think about the good things in your life right now...right now. Free yourself from all your worries. 

           Watch funny videos, laugh loudly which relaxes your body, relaxes tension in your muscles. Cut your relation with social media for some time and do the things which you like. Spent time with your pet, friends which lifts your mood.

            Try  54321.. Don't understand. It's simply a grounding tool. 5 things that you can see, 4 things that you can feel ( rotate ankle, nod head up and down), 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. Do when you feel anxious.

            Imagine you are walking in a jungle and you are face to face with a lion. What happens? Your heart beating fast, muscle tensed and you decided eithor fight or run. That is our body's response fight or flight. This is one kind of anxiety which keeps us alive.

              Massaging is the best way which relieves our stess, tension. Massage your body, scalp whenever you get time. If someone in future you will going to deal with such anxious person then reassure them that you will be there for them.

             Exercise...! Exercise...! Exercise...! It's good for your physical and emotional health. Keep your hand as well as mind busy.

             Positive self talk is important one during social anxiety by which you can self soothe yourself. Suppose your exam is in 5 days and you cannot avoid it. You ignore it because of fear and stress. But eventually the day come closer and closer, if you can see that you are more stressed and fatigued. Now your body feels low and want more rest. But if you say its our efforts of whole year, I want to know am I making any progress or not ? If I fail it's ok..I can put much efforts to next. So in this way you can initiate alternative thought by reminding yourself you are ready to go.

         There are four different types of remedies -

       1) Medication, Relaxation, Stress and anger management

       2) Talk therapy

       3) Cognitive behavioural therapy

       4) Antidepressants, Anxiolytic, nerve pain medication. 

          It is seen that teenager as well as adults turns to unhealthy ways of eating, drinking, taking drugs, smoking. This only leads your anxiety to worst. Eat only healthy and fresh foods such as Calcium rich foods, omega-3- fatty acid, fibre rich food, vitamins and proteins, whole grains, fresh fruits and green vegetables.             You can use scents to relieve stress. Lemon balm, ashwagandha, green tea, dark chocolates shows anti- anxiety effects which makes your mood positive. Don't afraid to talk. Talk about your anxiety, find good support.

Related :Depression

What is Holding Us Back ?

           Do you know why so many new year resolutions fail ? It's because sometimes rather than adding more things in your life, you can accomplish more by subtracting the things that are holding you back.

          What is holding you back from being the person you want to be ? There are the things by which you can let go what is holding you back.

  

        You get what, what you put in. If you don't put much, you won't get much out of it. The problem with people is that they want instant answers. They are looking for 2 minute solution to everything. Like  2 minutes maggie, they want instant happiness. This leads to disappointment. Don't go for shortcuts. Persistance is a strong will. People fail as they quit. Athletes put lots of years on practice for a few seconds or minutes of performance.

         Unwillingness to prepare is the another thing which holds you back. Winners put pressure on themselves. What is that pressure? That's the pressure of preparing and not worrying about winning. Pressure comes from being unprepared. There is no substitute, no options for preparation, practice, hardwork.

        When infants learn to walk, they keep falling, but to them it's not falling, it's learning. If they become discouraged, they would never walk. You have to lead when no one follows you. People with mental health believe in themselves no matter what until they win people over to their ways of thinking. Allen Car explains in his book ' The easy way to quit smoking ' that people stay in addiction because they are afraid of the unknown. Even though people know that their addiction is killing them they don't quit it. They know there life will become better but they hold on it while knowing that it is the thing that stopping you from getting what you want.

 

        Be confident. Think about the people who are poor, who don't get enough food to eat, shelter to sleep, who are handicapped but had succeed in life. There are lots to be thankful for.

 If you only think that what others think, you are not listening to yourself. Your attempts to gain approval from others will only hold you back. Sometimes its good to seek advice from others but don't constantly obey them. Listen yourself. Don't seek approval.  Self control, sacrifice, avoid distractions, stay focused. If you don't harness the flow of water, will never produce electricity. Proper direction leads towards the success. Sometimes the job we do is frustrating and we didn't like it, we want to quit it but have no energy to look for new one, we are afraid of qutting the job because of our responsibilities such as kids, family, education. But we forget that we have time to connect with other people in a meaningful way. 

       At the end of the day when you find yourself running on life's hamster wheel, ask yourself three questions -

1) am I able to change my thoughts ?

2) am I able to change my situation ?

3) am I able to change my perspective ?

  And by making this changes you can stay off from hamster's wheel. Sometimes we are trying to run away from frustrating situation and end up in worse place.

 Before moving into next act, make sure that you choose right path thus avoids jumping from one hamster wheel to another.

       A pause is the most productive time to manage yourself. Take a break observe your life from distance and once you feel fully recover ( energized ), then discover.  Collect the moments of joy whether its catching up with old friends or colouring whatever, those moments make you mindful. Those who can stay mindful in tough times, in stress they are the better thinkers. Fewer the distractions, more you become mindful. Be creative. Instead of compaining all the time, try to be creative, try something new. Turn your frustration in something meaningful that make you happy.

       Take some time, sit down and take look on the things that matters the most in your life. Here is the guide -

What does family mean to you, its of friends , relatives ? and how much they important to you ?, how often do you want to connect with different members of family ? Then next is work.. are you doing the work you love ? If not then which are the steps you take to get work that you love ? Others are adventures, music, art etc.  Make a roadmap and keep close to you like when we driving we keep track on map then reach to the destination.

        We try so hard to be someone we are not, try so hard to impress others and even harder to impress ourselves that we forget to live. A man's mind is like a garden. If we plant good quality seeds, we will have a good quality garden. But if you don't plant anything, something will grow and that will be weed. Growth in order to meaningful must be positive. Negative emotions challenge your mental Strength. You have the power to manage your emotions so that you think clearly. Emotions have a time and place. We all have this ego within us which tells us to make the wrong choices. If you manage this then your life will be better.

         Desire is what a boy with burnt legs set the world record in the one- mile run because of his desire to succeed. Desire is what made a Wilma Rudolph who is paralytic the fastest woman on the track at the 1960 Olympics, she won 3 gold medals. Leave your comfort zone and see the potential opportunities available for you.

           Three kinds of people in this world, 

1) The People who make things happen

2) other is the People who watch things happen

3) lastly the people who wonder what happened   

        In which category do you fall into ?